Daughter of No Comment -- February 2004

[ DONC HOME ]

Why, oh why, in all the political debate, pontification and noise is there almost NO mention of the issues that women need action on to become full and equal participating citizens. I hardly hear the word women, a group that represents half or more of the electorate. Instead there are many dark suited white men bleating about children when they mean fetuses and who sound totally confused about the realities and responsibilities of reproduction. And confused they must be since even at the highest level (vice president) and with a gay activist child, Mr. Cheney has the hubris to say that if the President wants a constitutional amendment prohibiting gay marriage he will support it. We know only too well the difficulties of getting a constitutional amendment passed so the best that could happen is that they waste a lot of time and more money on a losing proposition. It is a lot easier for them to tell women what they "should do" than to explain the deficit that is affecting every facet of our social fabric from the infrastructure to education and our country's future. Gloria Steinem, who was recently widowed, was asked if she regretted not marrying sooner and she replied, "Oh no. I never thought of that. I didn't want to marry until then (she married at age 66, 4 years ago). I couldn't have married in my 20's or 30's. The laws were terrible. You gave up all your civil rights (to sole property ownership and credit). It wouldn't have been personally right." She urged women to vote and to band together in activism. A couple of her quotes........"Men should think twice before making widowhood women's only path to power." (Think back to who the early congresswomen were--all widows) and "Power can be taken, but not given. The process of the taking is empowerment in itself." This strong role model has turned 70 and they say older women become more radicalized, so stay tuned for her beautiful voice. University of Chicago professor, George Chauncey has been researching the history of sexuality and how homosexuality has been referred to historically in medical literature since 1900. He assumed homosexuals had always and everywhere existed, and he began to understand how ambiguous the definition is. Was it the sexual actions or what was being explained about them that defined the type of sex it was. His research led him to realize that in the 1920's when "some men who enjoyed sex with other men weren't stigmatized as homosexuals at all---so long as they never took the "female" role in intercourse." His books are fascinating and show yet again that what is called history only reflects what the writer wants to shed light on. For women in history books, darkness has reigned. Are Boards of Directors becoming more women friendly? The latest numbers show that women now hold 13.6% of all board seats in the Fortune 500, up 1.2% since 2001. This glacial change means that if this rate continues, in 20 years women won't have made it to the 25% level. Among the Fortune 500, 54 have no women on their boards, and 54 companies have 25% or more women board members. The best companies are Golden West Financial Corp., Avon Products Inc., WellPoint Health Networks Inc. and TIAA-CREF. Women of color hold just 3% of the seats in 415 companies where race data is available. Stockholders voices can be heard so if you have shares you can let management know what you think. If they reply let us all know what they say. Psychotherapist, Amy Bloom whose book "NORMAL: Transsexual CEOs, Cross-dressing Cops and Hermaphrodites with Attitude" takes on stereotypical sex roles and helps us to understand the continuity or flow of human sexuality. For example, about 2,000 times a year doctors stare at a newborn and can't decide whether it is a male or a female. When faced with dual sex organs the doctor can play God, do tests or assign a sex and cut away the extra parts. "Gender is fluid, a range of possibilities instead of the more comforting and easier categories of only Column A and Column B. Our mistake is in thinking that the wide range of humanity represents aberration, when, in fact, it represents just what it is: range." AIDS research scientists (who asked that they not be identified) who apply for grants from the National Institute of Health or The Center for Disease Control and Prevention say they have been advised they can avoid unfavorable attention by keeping certain key words out of their applications. Examples are "sex workers," "men who sleep with men," "anal sex" and "needle exchange." An official, who doesn't want to be named, said it was policy but "You won't find any paper or anything that advises people to do this." This has been true for some time but the degree of scrutiny under the Bush Administration is "much worse and more intense," the official said. One University of California researcher was told a NIH grant application should be cleansed and should not contain the contentious words "gay" or "homosexual" or "trans-gender." The researcher said it is hard to find acceptable words when the subject of the study is gay men. Daughter is looking for new words. Euphemism time is here. Any ideas are welcome and perhaps they can also be used by the administration to explain how they are spending all the money that isn't there. It is time for the word wizard to come forward. In the 100 years (since 1901) that Nobel Prizes have been awarded only 3% have gone to women. All 13 last year went to men. Words of wisdom from 40 year old movie star Meg Ryan, "I used to feel like a phony if I was out there with colored nails and a lot of makeup...but now I see that you can go a long way on that stuff--the nails, the breasts, the high heels, the walk, the deep voice, Men don't realize how manipulated they can be. They are really sitting ducks a lot of the time." Daughter thinks she is on to something. The common medical school practice of permitting pelvic exams on anesthetized women without their knowledge may be changing because of the criticism that patient rights are being trampled. A recent study showed that that the students didn't know if consent had been obtained on over half of the pelvis exams they performed. A study published in The American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology showed that by the time students completed their ob-gyn training they considered patient consent significantly less important than did students who had not completed their training. Diana Zuckerman, president of the National Center for Policy Research for Women and Families says "It feels like an invasion of privacy." One of the problems is that students are not willing to ask the doctors if consent has been obtained lest it suggest they are questioning the quality of the care their teacher is providing. Daughter thinks The doctor as God On A Pedestal myth starts early in their training process. African women are forming groups to denounce genital mutilation which is still widely practiced there. And yes, there are reports of it being done in this country even though it is not legal. Kenyan native Roselyn A. Odera who is the African program director for Equity Now, a New York based advocacy group which works to stop the mutilation says "From the screams you hear you know it is painful. There's no anesthesia. The instruments are rudimentary. It's beyond imagination how anyone could do this to another human being-especially little girls." Last fall, a 20 year old woman from southern Ethiopia raised a stir when she refused to be cut. Genet Girma, who was thrown out of her home as a result, wore a placard at her wedding saying "I am not circumcised. Learn from me." Addisie Abosie, her longtime boyfriend, wore a similar sign saying "I am very happy to be marrying an uncircumcised woman." The protest shocked elders but it has already prompted other girls to forego cutting ceremonies as a prelude to marriage. Rosie O'Donnell explaining her trashing of celebrities Bill Clinton and Michael Jackson during a stand-up performance, "I'm no longer a talk show host. The bitch ain't so nice anymore." Reminds Daughter that BITCH means beautifully in total control of herself. Lest anyone think sexual predators are all male........Langston Hughes Middle School (Reston, VA) teacher, Vanessa Baker, 26, faces charges of carnal knowledge and custodial indecent liberties with a 14 year old girl. The sexual relationship lasted 6 months. Daughter thinks that since we lose our minds when an entertainers breast is shown on TV we are not smart enough to help our kids understand when to say NO and mean it by telling a parent when they have a problem. A woman in space? Heaven Forfend..In January 1961, small groups of women who were pilots began arriving in New Mexico for medical tests to assess their potential as astronauts. They weren't paid and some had quit their jobs to try and participate. At least 13 passed all the tests and were fit to go. Except, of course, for the macho culture of the space program. Democrat President Lyndon Johnson wrote on a memo "Let's stop this now!" And so it was. It was sent back to committee after committee with jokes about how women were needed to populate the alien planets and other old-boy jokes so in the end the Soviets beat American women in space by 20 years. Too bad this story wasn't public earlier so we could have bashed some "political friends" with it. Daughter wants to know, can you put your tax payment in escrow? When Hannah Arbuckle (IN) realized that the man (Robert Joseph Braun) outside her home was the same one who had been peeping at her in the shower, she jumped into the bed of his pickup truck. As he drove away she dialed 911. A search of his home after the cops caught up and arrested him uncovered video tapes and pictures-some of them of Ms. Arbuckle. The suspect also turns out to be a convicted rapist. Ms Arbuckle admits that it was "stupid" to take him on all by herself but says that that night "was the first night in a long time that I slept well, because I knew he would not be outside and looking through my window." To Daughter that sounds like empowerment and bravery by a victim. The Vienna Philharmonic still only has two women and the orchestra president Clemens Hellsberg says "We have to preserve and defend this system that we received from our predecessors. Founded in 1842 , there is still the chauvinistic belief that an all male orchestra sounds different (better) than when women play although this has not been a problem for all the other European orchestras. Elena Ostleitner a musicology professor at the Vienna conservatory says she would like women to be admitted to the orchestra "a little faster. But, it's a difficult and delicate issue. It's as if the pope were going to be a woman." Daughter feels she may well be on to something. Let us all make a joyful noise as we advocate for our issues and our civil rights. Being quiet is not an option as we face a very difficult election knowing what the outcome means for the Supreme Court and all areas of our public and private lives.