Daughter of No Comment -- February 2003

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The old Chinese curse "May you live in an interesting time" is working overtime. So many political, legislative and financial problems are making life difficult for girls and women that Daughter doesn't know where to begin. Since we seem to have the best government that money can buy, let's think about money. The Muslims are. In a direct attack on Coca-Cola overseas, alternative colas are being marketed with the slogan "Liberate your taste. Don't drink stupid, drink committed." As American women who are being targeted by many vendors whose bottom line is their only concern, we need to think about our spending as a tool for our futures and a way to obtain our political goals. If our local Wal-Mart doesn't fill Rx's for Emergency Contraception and won't change the policy why should we spend our dollars there? Daughter's slogan is "Don't spend stupid, spend committed." The Jupiter (FL) Elkettes of the Jupiter Elks Lodge are singing and making decorations, says their president Jo Moore. Isn't that special? But now there are the Exchangettes of the Northern Palm Beaches who also do good works. Their president, Cathi Markisen presented a plaque to the Exchangette of the Year but Daughter is clueless. What new ladies "ladies" group will appear with a cute diminutive name? Confused and puzzled? Who? Martha Stewart? Yes. She said that she's "puzzled by the public's delight" in her troubles. "My business is about homemaking" and that I have been turned into or vilified openly as something other than what I really am has been really confusing." She gave Home Economics a whole new meaning. $$$ Talk about a double standard. This was taken from a deposition by New Hampshire Bishop John B. McCormack who said about the Rev. Roland Cote that while he had sex with a boy, the boy was not a parishioner. "You know, one is an activity where you have a trusted relationship with a parishioner. The other is an activity where you are away from the parish and you're off on your own. I'm very concerned about that; he was a young person. But it's quite different from being a parishioner." The sex was paid for and it was at least a 5 year affair. But not to worry. Since the teenager wasn't a parishioner, the priest could do whatever he wanted? Daughter is not sophisticated enough to understand this concept. On a lighter note, dentists have perfected a "gum lift" for the problem they have named "gummy smiles" like those seen on Katie Couric and Chelsea Clinton. Dr. Robert Holt, a periodontist says "The way to correct this is to lengthen the teeth and trim away the gums." Daughter thinks it sounds like a $$$ cure for his new Mercedes. Did you know that women are supposed to wash their hair every day? Since so many women color and otherwise chemically treat their hair (60%) they find that dryness and brittleness are the result. But slacking off shampooing is a radical idea that many are too embarrassed to admit. Marketing Assistant Rachael Keys does hers every three days but says "it took me a long time to feel like I wasn't dirty because I didn't wash my hair." The ads for Proctor and Gamble Co's Pantene and L'Oreal's Fresh Vive and Aveda's Shampure all say that they should be used daily. The dreaded frizzies be damned. "Frizz is a national obsession says Michael Gordon a stylist and beauty salon owner. Some women will never stop washing daily. Cheri McMaster, a senior hair scientist at Proctor and Gamble uses six different products each day, spray in conditioner, shampoo, three minute conditioner, holding gel, hair wax and hair spray. She also washes daily. "I have a lot of sticky things in my hair," she says. DUH. Makes Daughter wonder, what exactly is a hair scientist? $$$ On a really beautiful note Deborah's Total Body & Skin Care Clinic's menu includes pre and post operative skin care, scar minimizing and camouflage because a lot of the clients are domestic abuse victims who have been burned, stabbed and beaten. Five of the seven women who work at the clinic were abused women so they have empathy for women who have been abused and want to feel better and need to get ready for job interviews. The extra $$$ here go to help the Association for Abused Women and Children in West Palm Beach, which operates a shelter for abused women and their children. NFL Dolphins defensive end player, Jason Taylor, helped deliver his baby and says of his wife and new son Isaiah "They're the ones that did all the work and I'm the one that's whipped. They're warriors. I'm the wimp, I guess, because I'm the one that's tired." "My wife Katrina is something else. People talk about playing through a knee or groin injury. Please. I'm a wimp. She is the toughest person I have ever met in my life. She's unbelievable." He is a real cheer leader for his family. Former Surgeon General, Dr. M. Joycelyn Elders, one of Daughters heroes, would encourage church leaders to put a basket of condoms in the back of the church if it would save one life. She said "The vows of abstinence break far more easily than latex condoms." She feels that preventing AIDS is an entire communities responsibility, not just individual families or churches or schools. New York art gallery owner and lawyer Marianne Boesky, 35, who has worked six days a week without a holiday for the last six years says "It's a cut throat business. If you are a man doing this job well you're called tough. But when you are a woman doing it, you are regarded as an hysterical bitch. " Daughter hopes she realizes what a beautiful word bitch is. One definition is Beautifully In Total Control of Herself. Safe sex web sites are blocked by internet filters installed by most schools and libraries. CDC's site on STD's, FDA's site on contraception failure (and here) and Princeton University's site on emergency contraception are all blocked. Most schools and libraries set their filters at the most restrictive levels resulting in blocking a quarter of all health sites and half of all web pages on safe sex. Caroline Richardson, a researcher at the University of Michigan says "A lot of teenagers don't go to their doctors with sexual questions because they are embarrassed or worried about confidentiality and the internet is an important way for them to get those questions answered." Not to worry. Jan LaRue, the general counsel of the Concerned Women for America (remember them?) says "Nobody says filters are perfect, but they're certainly very effective and I'm confident they can be used to keep kids from accessing pornography at taxpayer supported libraries." Aren't the web pages mentioned above taxpayer supported and products of the Federal government? Sounds more like censorship to Daughter. Rachquel Whilby, an analyst for Banc of America Securities, New York, filed a sexual harassment suit alleging the bank condones "a men's locker room mentality." The men allegedly grabbed her buttocks, offered to pay her for sex and labeled her a "stupid slut." Stay tuned for news on the stupid Banc employees. The National Association for Female Executives has a list of the top companies for executive women and only one in the Washington, Virginia, Maryland metropolitan area made the list, sad to say. Fannie Mae (D.C.) came in fifth. Many countries birth rates are slowing and some governments are concerned for their future. Catholic Italy with a long tradition of large families now has a birthrate of 1.19, one of Europe's lowest. Birthrate has important implications for economic policy and so governments ponder what to do. Literacy rates, prosperity and women's empowerment (increased availability of contraceptives) all affect birthrate as do government family policies which very widely. In Australia, some mortgages have a "pregnancy pause" option which allows couples to postpone payments for three months if they have a child. Much more questionable is the Fertility Society of Australia which wants teenage girls in school to be taught about the dangers of putting off pregnancy until they are much older. This has the stench of politics trumping over medical fact and we should all remember the time (pre Roe vs Wade) in the United States when many doctors talked about how dangerous abortion was when in fact it was safer than child birth. Currently the population of Iran where women were encouraged to bear more "soldiers of Islam" is one of the youngest in the world with 65% of its population under age 30. All women need the tools and freedom to make reproductive decisions for themselves and we all need to be concerned that their rights can be abrogated by politicians, clerics and economics. Auto maker Alfa Romeo's reputation as a macho car is looking for a few good women-and their pocketbooks. $$$. Tom Blackett, group deputy chairman at Interbrand says "Alfa Romeo is strongly associated with performance and sexiness and style but these great macho attributes may not be entirely appropriate for the future." Their new ads feature a female driver driving to the stylish looking venue, opening the car door, planting her high heeled foot firmly on the ground, She looks confident and self assured. Hans Hoegstedt, communications director for Alfa Romeo explains "We have used women in the advertising in the past, but it was more for the men to like them. Now we consider women part of the interest group." Daughter is underwhelmed and wonders how many women are executives in the company. Remember our new mantra--Don't spend stupid. They are still using women. 80 year old author, Norman Mailer who has been married six times says "It's not a good idea to try to put your wife into your novel. Not your latest wife, anyway." Words of wisdom from one who has been there. Joseph A. Califano Jr., chairman of the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University says latest research shows that girls "get hooked faster, get hooked using lesser amounts of alcohol and drugs and cocaine and they suffer the consequences faster and more severely." The study also showed that girls use for different reasons. Boys tend to use for thrills while girls are more likely to abuse substances if they reached puberty early, had eating disorders or were ever physically or sexually abused. The study suggests that girls need treatment programs tailored to their problems. The latest fashion note is that skirts are coming back to the stores. One problem is that many women simply don't wear skirts much anymore and especially not super-short miniskirts. Angela Ahrendts, executive vice president at Liz Claiborne, Inc., says that while pants outsell skirts 8 to 1, the company is really pushing skirts this spring. The industry is "pushing skirts to offer something new, to keep fashion evolving, to make the customer continually go into stores and have her update her wardrobe. That is the game." Daughter notes that the game is played with women's money. $$$ again. News on the United Way front. Remember William Aramony who had to resign after it was discovered he had stolen a lot ($1.2 million) of the charities money. Well he has been trumped. Jacquelyn Allen-MacGregor, the former vice president for finance (what else?) at the United Way in Lansing Michigan stole $1.9 million which she spent on her passion, quarter horses. There were no safe guards in place and one wonders what the board did and had anyone ever heard the word audit? It is safer to give money to charities that focus on our special interests and that are close to home. Daughters experience is that the further money travels more of it is spent on bureaucracy and much less is left to do the charity's work.